Thursday, November 27, 2008

Amazing Thailand

...and I thought life with a boyfriend in Bangkok would get boring. That thought was ridiculous.

Suvarnabhumi, a familiar place looks a bit different these days.

The world is bewildered about Thailand and its political standoff. I am not anymore of course, knowing a bit about Thai people and politics (only a bit though). While millions of travellers come to Thailand each year to see temples, the beaches, the sea, some of these travellers finally got to see what's below the shiny surface of the country. And I dont mean this negative. This country is truly amazing. I take it that everyone reading this blog knows that currently, an extra-parliamentary group called PAD (People's Alliance for Democracy) decided to walk to Suvarnabhumi, besiege it and take it under its control. The police was standing by idly but did not intervene. The thousands of passengers, among of course many Western travellers were bewildered. Some thought, the PAD (wearing yellow shirts) were football fans. I could watch on TV how just down the road at the airport, where I have been manymany times and know all the corners, Western travellers were angrily complaining. One American man was furious due to the fact that he was to miss Thanksgiving. Poor man. The pictures we get to see on BBC and CNN though are very misleading. It looks as if the city were on fire. Far from it, even at the airport, the siege seems more like a sit-in (much less violent than the 68 unversity sit-in's in Europe). Apparently, some people go around distributing food and water. Amazing. Well, in Thailand no one ever can go hungry. There's always some food around the corner and in the worst case, it will be offered. In the meantime, the Prime Minister is quickly running away to Chiang Mai. (Where else in the world can the Prime Minister not go to his capital and not step back??? I mean, you are supposed to be in charge of the country but you cant be in your capital...hello???) However, in this whole mess, there is no sense of urgency it seems. Thais are the most patient people that I have ever seen and the tourists should learn some of it! Lets see what happens, there's always a surprise in the air in "Amazing Thailand". If you want to be up to date, read the Bangkok Pundit's blog.

The "look tung" singer. I love his (gay) costume.

In the meantime, Bangkok does not stand still at all of course. As if nothing was going on, there was some party in my neighbourhood. Thais wouldnt let politics get in the way of a good celebration. There was food galore, "look tung" (Thai country style) music, dancing and shiny costumes and lots of happy faces. The Isan (Northeast region) boy singing was very pretty and he got many flowers to hang around his neck from admirers in the public. Then, I was watching this guy who was making "cha yen" (cold milk tea). He was artistically foaming and mixing the tea by pouring the liquid from one cup into an other. I took a picture. His friends spotted that and started making big big noise. He got very very shy. On the walk home I saw 7-11 guy in jeans and shirt. Gosh, he looks even better in non-7-11 uniform. He was disappointed I didnt talk to him.
Ultra-shy tea-pouring boy.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

A Tuesday Evening in Bangkok

As I was in MBK, I walked past this:

I walked past it and read "top" and "bottom" and thought...sounds familiar. Then I turned around and looked at it again: wonderful! We now have prices. A "top" costs 1895THB and a "bottom" - o wonder - also 1895THB. That's what I call equality. Same same. I wish the top-bottom issue would matter that little to Thais, but we have covered that discussion already. Anyway, I think 1895THB (~60USD) is rather expensive. What does that include? Does it come with a warranty? I imagine the top would cum (oops) with a "cum-on-your-chest" warranty whereas the bottom would be sure to have a "tight-and-stimulating-hole". I thought the economic crisis and slump in tourist numbers would cause prices to fall. (e.g. less demand and same supply --> falling prices) but these laws dont seem to apply here:)
Then, on the BTS later I saw the moneyboy that I flirted with ages ago. I wrote about him before I think but never mind. He looked at me. I think he's quite cute actually. When we got to "Saladaeng" he got off (very predictable stuff here) and a few metres behind him: his sugadaddy. Gosh, why does this moneyboy have such an ugly partner.
Then, I felt very very tense in my neck - so I went for a massage. Now, I hear you think already: ohoooo, happy ending, cute boy, 1500BHT. NONO, not with bangkokbitch. I had a big and really really rough and quiet lady. That's perfect. I do feel a bit weird when she sits on my ass and rams her knee into my back and I cant feel her bulge - but then again she is a lady. Im sorry but normally, someone would proceed to fuck me if that position is taken.
Then I went to 7/11 and 7/11-boy was there!!! I had seen him a few days ago when I was with my boyfriend. And he did NOT like that. So, he tried to flirt me again and was quietly waiting for me to come over and talk to him. I played game, but only partly; gave him a huge smile, thought that he is actually cuter than I thought and happily walked home, not actually having to deal with dating problems anymore.
Then, I crossed the pedestrian bridge and while I was looking at the 7/11- shop, some guy walked past me and looked me in the eyes. He was a tiny guy, not femme, not pretty, not ugly, and he looked really tired. I was surprised, turned around and he did the same. I was confused, walked on, and turned around again - he did the same. AHHHHHH, wont these gays let me be for one second???

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Gay update from the Island 2 - the RETURN

Well, well. Whereas I am already back in the ultra-gay territory of bangkok city, I need to update you on what else happened on the island - AND on the way back home.

Mister resort boy (I need to remind you, he is definitely too young for any real action and any serious considerations, plus I think he had an older brother there - and about 3 younger it's not advisable to flirt seriously) continued to eye me and we continued to smile at each other whenever we met. Then, on my last day I was watching a movie on my laptop (no porn, honey:P) in my sexiest yellow/orange/white undies lying on the bed with open curtains. resort boy was picking up leaves outside my room with his older brother. He was surprised to see me - and so was I. But we both managed to smile. Then he walked on, I looked back again and he bent back to catch another glimpse of me - and I caught him! Cute:) Later on he was cutting onions for the kitchen....cute cute. I will visit him again one day.

I was honestly sad to leave this place. Not really because of the resort boy. I liked the lovely people on the island. And even though I couldnt identify with the other farang on the island and the bangkok thais just snubbed me, I had a good time with the locals and a lovely english couple, just the age of my parents.
Boat driver in calm seas

On the way back, I had a freaking rollercoaster ride on the speedboat - for 3 hours instead of 1!!! and with a dozen silly and annoying europeans - some more annoying - some less. I like the dutch the most, very funny and ironic kinda people. The australians of europe, so to say. The german people next to me had the biggest mouth ever and got quieter towards the end - when they got sick. I then tried to help them get a cheap bus ride to their destination of choice - pattaya. They didnt take my offer (which would have saved them a lot) and instead went off - your loss. Anyway, opposite of me was this Swedish couple. He had long pony-tail hair, a beard and the longest and thinnest face I have ever seen. They complained at the hotel because the rooms were not "on the beach" - well what do you wanna do? sleep in the f***ing water, mister swede??? Anyway, his best feature by far were his cut jeans. they were as short as a miniskirt and therefore when he was sitting in the speedboat, one of his balls caught some fresh air - EWWWWWW!!! You know with ugly things, you need to look at it again and again!!!

Boat driver in strong winds - i love him, look at the flying hair!!
Anyway, there was a pretty thing on the boat too - the boat driver. I fell in love with him. I swear the waves were 2 metres high (that's high for such a small speedboat). But this young man just stoically kept his calm and rammed that freaking boat into the waves. He was a small guy but constantly looked into the distance with his long neck, concentrating on the next wave. And in the blowing wind, his long hair was flying beautifully. Wonderful.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Gay update from the Island

I am on the island and even though the “resort” here officially proclaimed that they have WIFI, they of course don’t. Wonderful. But it’s ok after all. I am reading, swimming, watching movies, reading, talking my classmate (but she left now, so I am talking to this middle-aged English couple), and of course checking out the local boys.
Since I am officially trying to let go of the Thai ideals of beauty and inhibitions towards non-television-style people, I am also checking out the country-boys. I must say, I find it somehow really hot to think about sex with countryside guys. I mean, they have possibly never had sex with a guy and most probably never with a foreigner. They don’t have the complicated mindset of a Bangkokboy and questions such as “are you top or bottom (and if we are both bottom or top we can only be “friends”)” do not appear. Countryside people are more easy-going and curious.
So, what does the little resort have to offer? Quite a few young boys who clean up, serve food and carry bags and because there are practically no guests, they have nothing to do and just lie around lazily in the hammock or in front of the TV. But until today, when my (girl)friend left, about 120% of all the people thought that we were a couple, after all what does a Thai girl and a foreign guy do together on an island? Well, now she’s gone and I can see the difference already. The boy that I thought was cute acknowledged me today. I walked to my room and he was walking down the lawn on the other side. He looked, I looked and we both smiled. Then, later, I walked past the TV-sala (sala is Thai for a pavilion), he acknowledged me again and gave me a big smile. Also, he had a new hair-do. Some sort of 3-dimensional hair. I am staying 2 more nights, so let’s see...the boy is shy and too young – but flirting is more than half of the fun. And I will get that part of the fun for sure!

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Living in the Big City

Well, lately I have been busy recovering from my cold (still not 100% healthyL), mourning the royal death (and therefore exclusively wearing black and other sober colours...BLACK IS THE NEW BLACK in Bangkok these days!!!), living a nice boyfriend life (going to loy krathong (loy krathong is a Thai festival where people put a nice little boat with candle and incense stick into any kind of water while saying prayers. As far as I know, the meaning is to make all the bad things go away and wish for an obstacle-free next year. If you feel you are serious with your partner, you can/should float a krathong together) together, watching movies together, eating together and so on...) but also studying like a good student. And that’s why I am going on an island in the East of Thailand tomorrow. Yes, to study!
Which brings me to the topic of city life. You see, I have grown up on the countryside. In farangland, I grew up in a village, population 3’500. Ok, there are some cities close-by but still, countryside. Then I moved to a city, population 75’000 to study. It’s still like a village. I have always loved cities and especially city-life though. When I would travel to cities I would never check out the attractions or sights. I would just walk around and try to get the feel for a city. I was most-fascinated when I started visiting Asia a few years ago. First Seoul, then Hong Kong and Singapore; lastly Manila and Bangkok. I think I still love Seoul the most. I was mesmerised by the sheer amount of people, life and hustle and bustle. I was overwhelmed in fact. In farangland, everyone is at home in front of the TV once school or work stops but in the big Asian cities (mind you it was cold November in Seoul) people were out in the streets eating, chatting, promenading and enjoying. And they were well-dressed too. A few months later, it was like a revelation to see a packed restaurant at 3.30am on a weekday opposite of my hotel room in Hong Kong. These experiences made me move to Asia. It was Bangkok due to a coincidence and connections of my university. Bangkok is much of the same, smaller and less shiny than Seoul and Hong Kong and less violent on the eye than Manila, but also much more interesting than any of these cities probably. Bangkok is wonderfully international (you don’t ever read about this in magazines or blogs...). Bangkok is at the crossroads of Asian cultures. Influences of China (tradition), Japan and Korea (business and pop-culture), India (spirituality and immgrants), Muslim Southeast Asia (from the south of Thailand), Australian expats (and sadly backpackers),
European and American travellers and expats, there’s everything.
Chinese culture in Bangkok
Euro-Antipodean-American culture in Bangkok
Korean culture in Bangkok
Christian influence in Bangkok
One place which I personally find one of the best measurements of internationality of a place is the supermarket. Go to Gourmet Mart in SiamParagon, or the supermarkets in Centralworld or Central Chidlom and you will possibly find the widest choice of international products you have ever seen.
But living in the city can be exhausting. There’s always a friend to meet, a movie to be seen, a shop to be visited or a temple to be seen. But, it takes TIME to move between places...a lot of time! And I am still on the search for a quiet place with wireless, plug and a nice view nearish to my home to study...that’s why I am going on a break on the island for a few days. Studying on the beach sounds appealing to me!
p.s. this time the pictures are taken by the bangkokbitch herself:)

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Bangkokbitch gets insulted

first of all the good news, I am less sick. I can breathe again and I am not feeling psycho anymore thanks to that silly drug...

But then, the other day someone commented on my blog entry dating Thais - a wrap up. Read this:

"I think you farangs just ignorant individuals - you do not fully appreciate the culture neither do you want to understand it. So embed with western values that cannot be imposed to different cultures, no wonder you guys are misreble old queens.

get out of Thailand!"

wonderful. I was shocked first. Some person wants me out of thailand.

Then, this mister anonymous guided me to this forum called to be enlightened by him. Well, he did write an interesting article in the forum and I answered precisely but since then, mister anonymous has died.....where are you? who are you? why did you lash out against me?

anyway, the boys (or more appropriately: the gentlemen) from sawatdee-gay-forum did not welcome me at all to their forum.


some of them thought that they had to be either drunk or high to read my blog. I also asked a serious question regarding HIV in bangkok, since I thought I was among the wasnt received well at all. well, I dont know why you dont understand what I write but maybe your world is just a little too different from mine. I will stop reading your suggestions about go-go bars, pattaya and so on and you can stop reading my accounts of my daily life as a young person trying to live a life which nearly exclusively revolves around young urban thais.

p.s. the promised pictures will follow...I have collected quite a few already

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Bangkokbitch sick and getting the wrong pills

I am sick. No, I have been sick for nearly a week now. What started out as a common cold became really really weird. I got really strong coughs so I went to see the doctor at the hospital near my place. I must say, he was young and cute and also charming - but ultimately an IDIOT! because he prescribed me medication costing 1900bht (60US$) that f***ed up my brain! This medication is called "romilar" and is supposed to suppress the urge to cough, e.g. altering your brain functions so it doesnt think you need to cough. Now the first night when I took this medication I slept at 3am. That's not ideal when you are sick. The second night (yesterday) I went to see james bond with boyfriend and slept at 2am. Again, not ideal when sick. The problem is that this medication raises my alertness to a very high point, it makes me stare at things, it makes me hyperactive, it puts me into a drunk-alike state....and this is scary. I dont like the cute doctor anymore because he gave me very very strong medicine without even warning me! How could he do that? I read on an internet site that a high dosage of this medication can lead to out-of-body experiences and hallucination.....scary shit.

The source of all evil!!! These little yellow tablets!

I just wanna say that I think that here in Thailand strong medication is given out too easily...beware!!! and inform yourself about the medication you get!!!

In the meantime, lets hope this cold goes away soon.....and lets hope I am coming down from my high state induced by that evil, evil "romilar"

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Thais are beauty fascists - part 1

the event that makes me so angry and bitter is the following. remember the lost teddy? it was the guy from my class that suddenly fell in love with me and became my stalker. I got word from a (girl) classmate today that apparently he was publicly (in class) bitching about my boyfriend's looks. he said something like: "ewwwwwww, he is not even handsome, he should choose someone much more handsome". that really pissed me off.

Ok, he's entitled to think that. My bf isnt 190cm tall, doesnt have wide shoulders and no manly, "handsome" face. But what the f**k? That in no way justifies someone publicly bitching about it so everyone else can hear it (I wasnt there of course).

then, my classmate (the girl) said something that wasnt less offensive, only she didnt know it. She tried to somehow explain me that thais dont think that a wide face and small eyes are beautiful. Now lets think about this again. Wonderful, she in a way justified his bitching by reciting thai beauty ideals.

Now I know all about Thai beauty ideals and I also have thought a lot about them but this now prompts me to write about them. If you want to be beautiful in Thailand you have to be tall, slim, have fair skin, have big eyes, have a slim face, have straight hair and a faultless appearance in general. If any of the above-mentioned criteria are not met you will struggle to be beautiful in a thai person's eyes. For foreigners, slightly different standards apply but nevertheless, I was told several times: "xxx you are not handsome...but you are cute". or: "xxx, when did you get fat?" I just wanna let you know, I am not fat. If I go to farangland I am pretty much in the average...

Maybe the things that are the most interesting is the shape of the face and the skin colour. In terms of shape of the face, a slim face is essential. If the face is บาน (baan, wide) that is not good at all. A square face (e.g. Thaksin Shinawatra) is not good either. Cheekbones are not very advantagous either.

no beautiful, his face is too wide and square.

In terms of skin colour, we all know that in Asia in general, the whiter the skin, the better. It's the other way around as in Europe, where a tanned, brown skin is considered attractive and sexy. Here, dark skin is associated with country-side people who have to work on the farm, hence they get dark by working outdoors all day long. The association goes: the darker, the poorer. I personally had the experience many many times that guys I met actually excused themselves for their dark skin.

Now, I want you to think about this: WHY is it that Thais, who are normally very accepting of other people's lifestyles and choices (e.g. are "tolerant") can be such fascists in terms of beauty (only one beauty ideal counts)? My boyfriend noticed that the people that feature in Thai ads are nowhere to be seen on the street. That is quite true.....and additionally, no one in ads is dark and Thai-thai (as opposed to chinese-thai) (except on these fertiliser ads during muay thai on Channel 3 maybe). I know about the connection between skin-colour and income - thai chinese are richer and whiter. But how come thais can be so extreme in this, otherwise being quite accomodating and tolerant?

Actually, fellow blogger bkkdreamer has already blogged here, here and here on the "honey-coloured" beauties and explained us a little bit about skin-colour and beauty ideals. You would notice that these "honey-coloured" beauties are by no means dark, even though it is something like a taboo in thai society to even like someone who doesnt have pale skin.

Now even though I notice that some of these beauty ideals have crept into my mind too (im too immersed in Thai culture), I really want you to stick to what you think is beautiful. Skinny, tall, chubby, wide-faced, dark, white, curly hair, blue eyes, whatever.....stick to it!!!

p.s. I promise you. I will provide you with some picture-examples of what I mean next time:)

Saturday, November 1, 2008

bangkokbitch and public toilets

but first, something else: I now have a boyfriend. I need to explain this a little. Before I came to Bangkok, I lived in farangland with this Korean man. We were together for 2 years and lived together sharing the same house, bed and everything else for one year. The end-result...I broke up and we moved apart. Then, on a fine day in June, he called me: "xxx, I booked a flight to Bangkok on October 13, I am coming to live here for 10 months." UGH.....I was shocked. To cut the story short, we are back together. I hate that phrase. It's associated with losers who cant make up their mind and are too useless to move on from someone and too lazy to get a life beyond the comfort of the boyfriend. This is different though...and I will elaborate on this soon and discuss things as "second chances", the (im?)possibility of a relationship in gay Bangkok and my own feelings of course...stay tuned.

Well....the "newlyboyfriended" bangkokbitch is still touring bangkok, which means there are some gay things bound to happen. And yesterday (lets include friday night too) was a gaygaygay day. I dont know why but it actually scares and annoys me. Back in the faranglands where I lived, when I met people I liked, the BIG question always propped up: Is he gay? Here in bangkok, it's more like you need to come out if you are straight, and my straight (girl)friends are complaining: "there are no real men around." I agree. Friday night at the worldfilm festival, screening of the Thai movie "A Moment in June" by O Nathapon: roughly 80% gays including the director, the actors and most of the public. In the Q&A session, one fag said: "I liked the movie and I think you are cute". What a superficial asshole. You can think that (and in fact it's true) but to say that was behaving like a 14yo teenie boyband crybaby. Then, a famous blogger that I dont want to mention here flirted with me in two different locations. Fast forward to yesterday: Went to RCA with two fag friends to watch a movie (with gay content of course). And I must say, I have never been to RCA but this place is weird and fascinating. I thought that this is a different city and I cant describe why but it felt like a place in a mid-sized sea town, such as pattaya (without the whores). Promptly, we went to Starbuck(s), which was gay-central (and also hosted several farang man-thai girl/lady couples (or mis-couples...dont know about that). Then I went to the "public toilet". One guy suddenly went in in front of me and another guy followed. Gosh.......I got out of there as quickly as possible.

Back in Silom, we had dinner in a restaurant in CP Tower (I believe). I saw about 27 gays and gay couples including the hunchback boy (a cute waiter noted for his hunched back) from Telephone Bar in Soi 4 with a roughly 35yo Asian man, who probably took him out for dinner before fucking the shit out of him later in a hotel room. Then I went to the toilet and guess was cruising central. Everyone eyeing everyone else including some guy going into the cublicle next to me only to make lots of noise with his belt....GOSH...I didnt pee and left the toilet hurriedly, only to be eyed by a middle-aged farang man. Then I went to get an HIV test at the community clinic in Bangkok Christian Hospital on Silom Road also. It was nice there. Lovely people, some gays around but they were not Silom gays...just normal gay people minding their business. That felt so wonderful that we can be gay next to each other without thinking about more...

Then we proceded to Khao San road - which is great big fun but not noted for its gayness. Well, we all got drunk on a 150Bht (5USD) BUCKED of some sort of drink prepared by a burmese bar boy. I then had to go to the toilet - already pretty drunk...burmese boy promptly showed me where it is, looked at me and said: you - me - two boys.....yes that is right, we are both boys/men....but what did THAT mean? That was all the gayness...and now I am wondering if I can ever go to a toilet again without being harassed...